The Holidays: Transforming Stress Into Joy and Peace
HOLIDAY FESTIVITIES
Ah, the holidays! Here we are again. Doesn’t it seem like time is speeding up and Christmas sneaks up out of nowhere every year? People are putting up Christmas decorations and lights the day after Halloween. When did this become a thing? It’s interesting to see the anticipation of a holiday, like we are living in the future without enjoying the present moment. Retail stores sell a season in advance, so it seems we are constantly chasing what is to come. It’s one thing to prepare for the upcoming festivities, and quite another to run around for months in advance feeling overwhelmed and pressured to consume as much as possible. Has our consumption culture lost the meaning of the holidays?
It all starts with Black Friday, the obsession with getting a deal, even though it probably isn’t really a deal since most things are way overpriced. However, the word SALE sends most of us running to the nearest super store, getting in line to get our hands on the next big advancement in television or computer technology. Have you ever been in a crowded store, amongst everyone searching for Christmas decorations, gift wrapping, and pre-packaged presents, and sensed the overwhelming amount of stress and anxiety bouncing off the walls? For those of you that sense the emotional fields of others, this can be quite daunting. With most people running around in a hurry, feeling rushed to buy gifts on time, or simply feeling obligated to participate in buying items for others, the energy of the shopping environment can be uncomfortable and painful for some.
This time of year is full of celebration, gatherings with family and friends, gift exchanges, parties, and an excessive amount of spending. Getting together with family and friends and spending time with loved ones can either be exciting and joyous, or downright awful, depending on how you view the Christmas season. For as many people that love the holidays and look forward to every celebratory opportunity, there are those that despise it with a passion. The question is where do you fit into this mix? If you want to enjoy the holidays, but feel like you are pulled in a million different directions before the actual day arrives, what can you do to transform the holiday season into a festive and enjoyable experience with a deeper meaning than just gifting everyone you know with a present you think they might like?
WHY THE STRESS?
Where does the stress come from? Why do we feel the need to participate in the game? If you love Christmas time, then you know what’s in store. You might be someone who is very prepared, organized, and possibly ready way in advance. We all know people who buy Christmas presents in July. However, most people are not on that program. Some secretly dream of getting all holiday requirements out of the way early, yet life inevitably happens, and we end up winging it every year. Yet, somehow, it all gets done, doesn’t it? Whether you were prepared in advance, or you were wrapping presents up until the midnight hours on Christmas Eve, somehow everything unfolds as it should.
There is an unspoken pressure in today’s culture. Whether it’s from the constant barrage of commercial advertisements pushing the latest products and services down your throat, or the dream in our head of a magical Christmas where everyone gets gifted with whatever their heart desires this year, there is an underlying expectation and obligation around the holiday season. If you have a family, this pressure can be much worse than for those that are single. The family individual may feel the stress of buying something for each member of the family, whereas the single person feels stressed because they don’t have a family to enjoy and celebrate the holidays with. The grass is always greener on the other side, isn’t it? No matter what your personal situation is, your mind will find a reason to stress out.
What if you could eliminate these worries and simply enjoy the holiday? What if you dropped the unnecessary mental chatter about pleasing everyone around you and do what is best for yourself, and your pocket book? Is Christmas time really about gifts? Or is it about telling the ones you love how you feel about them? Is it about appreciation of your life and those that support, uplift, and enrich your life each and every day? Is it possible to drop the overwhelm, stay connected to the greater essence of spirit, and enjoy this beautiful time of year?
STAY IN THE PRESENT MOMENT
Of course, this option exists, it’s merely a matter of actually doing it. You can get caught up in the mind’s need to keep up with everyone around you, or you can take a deep breath, take a step back, and evaluate how YOU want to experience the holiday season. Make an intention to stay in the moment and not jump too far ahead of yourself which will only cause anxiety and painful kinks in your neck and shoulders! Ask yourself what do you want to feel like, what do you want to do, how do you want to celebrate, do you want to celebrate at all, what will make you happy? Are you doing what is expected of you, or do you genuinely enjoy participating in the events of the season? Allowing yourself the space to evaluate what you want this season, can make all the difference in how you interpret your time with those you care about. By simply checking inward, relaxing into your breath when holiday stress creeps in, will pull you back to sanity quickly.
If you don’t want to get wrapped up in buying a million gifts, then how can you transform a physical gift into gifting someone your gratitude for having them in your life. There are many ways to celebrate the holidays with people you care about other than buying things. How about meeting a dear friend for coffee, spending time together and connecting by inquiring about how they are? Maybe suggest a meal with loved ones where everyone brings a dish, no gifts, and you spend the time being completely present with them and sharing each other’s company. Have you thought about writing a loved one a letter, expressing how you feel about them in your life? Words can be a wonderful substitute for a gift. Expressing how you truly feel will warm someone’s heart instantly. You could offer to help a friend in need, someone who really needs your help as a way of connecting in the moment and sharing your love during the holidays. There are so many opportunities to extend love and gratitude this time of year without spending money you don’t need to or may not have.
Unfortunately, most of society is absorbed in the commercialization of Christmas, rather than taking the time to experience the deeper spiritual meaning with others. Acknowledging how truly alike we all are underneath our particular life circumstance is where the beauty really lies. It has become more about what I can buy someone, than sharing a deep connection or appreciating the people you have in your life. Cherishing the love and connections you have with the closest people in your life can motivate you to give them something special. The gift is merely a symbol of how you feel about them. Some people do not know how to tell the one’s they love how they feel, so gifting is there way of showing appreciation. But, what if you could express how you feel? Would it make you feel more connected to the person you love? Why not give it a try. Expression can shift your entire life if you just have the willingness and courage to do it. No matter how you choose to spend the holidays, staying in the now moment with whomever you are with, and whatever you are doing will eliminate the chaos and keep your inner world at peace.
CREATE A BEAUTIFUL CLUTTER FREE SPACE
Besides staying present and eliminating expectations this holiday season, keeping your physical space free of clutter and full of life and vibrance can help create a festive and joyful environment. With all the added gifts it can be difficult to keep your home clutter free. Extra bags, boxes, wrapping paper, and ribbon can accumulate in the corners of your house so quickly that the energy can become stuck. Taking the time to place these items in an inconspicuous space, out of the main area, will allow energy to flow freely.
If you have too many trinkets, decorative items, and other Christmas decor shoved into every crevice of your space, it can feel a bit overwhelming. Instead of shoving seasonal decor into your home on top of your everyday relics, first you might consider removing items for the season and replace them with holiday items that uplift you. Less is more in terms of energy flow, so if you are sensitive to crowded spaces, keep this in mind as you create your peaceful holiday space.
If you are seeking a calm holiday space, pick a color theme and stick with this throughout all of your decor. This creates symmetry, beauty and serenity. If you incorporate too many colors that do not blend well, it puts off a chaotic vibrational feeling. Keeping your items in the same color wavelength will make a world of difference. Adding lights to different areas of your home is also an affordable and festive touch. String lights in glass vases, wrapped around a railing, or other items in your home can bring the holiday spirit you are looking for.
Other nice touches are adding a soft holiday fragrance that uplifts or calms you. Burn candles that make you feel good and emit a subtle peace into your environment for everyone to enjoy. Make foods that you love and share them with others, watch your favorite holiday movies, go look at Christmas lights or venues that decorate with extraordinary light shows, drink hot drinks that soothe your soul, and stay present with yourself throughout this holiday season. Keeping your home environment beautiful and calm can help you enjoy this anticipated event each year and keep yourself in a connected peaceful space as you maneuver through the inevitable chaos that may come your way.
MANAGING UNCOMFORTABLE ENERGIES DURING THE HOLIDAYS
Finally, for those of you that are empathetic and sensitive to the energy around you, keeping the nervous system in balance is critical to how you feel. Here are some suggestions to maintaining your own sanity, as well as grounding yourself physically.
SHOP AT UNPOPULAR TIMES. There is nothing worse than getting trapped in a store with hundreds of anxious people grabbing every last gift they can get their hands on. To avoid the energetic turbulence, go early in the morning, or later at night. Less commotion settles the energy within the store walls and will help you navigate a little better. Ask someone to shop with you if you have a tendency to get lost in all of the stuff floating around. There is always more inventory during the holidays, which equals more information in your energetic field. Know what is best for you and don’t be afraid to ask and make it happen.
GROUND YOURSELF PHYSICALLY. During this time, pull yourself into the body as much as possible. Focus your attention into the body, really feel it. When you are over stimulated, you will want to float out of the body. Use your body to pull inward. Feel your feet on the ground, squeeze your fists, breathe in and breathe out. Repeat this over and over until it becomes routine. Make a conscious effort to feel the body instead of disconnecting from it. There is a time and a place for disconnecting, and walking through a crowded box store is not the ideal time.
MOVE YOUR BODY. Incorporate exercise into your life during the holiday season. When life gets busy it’s easy to put exercise and stretching on the bottom of the list or eliminate it all together. Put it on the top of your list knowing it will help you stay grounded and more relaxed. Stretching, yoga, meditation, walking, or any exercise that works for you to find inner harmony will do the trick. Even if you only have 20 minutes, absolutely take it!
ALLOW THE ENERGY TO FLOW. When attending holiday functions, gatherings, or parties, work with the energy you may be picking up. Panic can set in when you feel overwhelmed. Take a moment to discern what you are feeling. Is it yours, or is it coming from the environment you are in? What is being communicated to you? Finding the stillness within, and listening for several moments, will allow this space to grow so that you can traverse through the complicated energetic ocean you encounter.
PICK AND CHOOSE. If you are particularly sensitive right now, pick and choose what you are capable of attending, and what you cannot. Honor where you are instead of what others may be expecting of you. Can you attend for a short time if that would benefit you? Can you step out of the party for a few moments to ground yourself and reenter? If you are really struggling, simply express you are unable to attend this year. Don’t feel guilty because life is tossing you into a new experience. Know that one day you will get better at living amongst these newfound energetic experiences. It simply takes a little practice and a desire to figure it out.
Whatever the holiday season brings your way, there are always opportunities to find peace and calm in the midst of any seasonal expectation. Know there will always be people stressing out and forgetting what the holidays are about. But you can choose to experience them however you wish. It’s all up to you to make it happen.